Grandparenting with Grace: Grace so amazing

I may continue to  struggle, or one could say wallow. In Self-pity. I am ashamed. How did I become this person I am? How did I become so ungrateful for all I have and when did I start focusing on what is missing, what I want, how it should be? My way.

I am so glad I came across http://www.aholyexperience.com and Ann Voskamp. I am certainly put to shame by her quiet thankfulness. My life is God planned, and God directed. It doesn't have to be special in the eyes of anyone except God- not even me.

I remember many times saying that, "If God would just send me a postcard telling me exactly what He wants me to do- I'd gladly do it." Well He has and I still respond foolishly. It has been spelled out clearly to me exactly what is being asked.

May I be grateful for all I have, all I will have, and the love I am capable of receiving and giving. may I truly be in awe of the trust, faith, and belief my God has shown me-may I return a fraction back.

Thank God for grace so amazing..

Grandparenting with Grace: The Problem with pride

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

I have been reading and working my way through the book Brokenness the Heart God Revives by Nancy Leigh Demoss and published by Moody Press. I find that my occasionally falling into the pits of giving myself a pity part is a sign that I suffer from the sin of pride. Yup, there it is- Pride, the culprit that is ruining my life. Now this is something I can do something about (Is that pride, being so sure?). Yet, as I try to eradicate pride from my life, I find it lurking behind every corner, beyond every hurdle  I manage to clear, this thing called pride gathers new life and masquerades as another unique and companionable form.

I believe pride, in some shape or form, is probably the basis of every sinful action or thought I have. Pride is so easily disguised.  It is easy to dress pride as living a godly lifestyle. Pride can be dressed up in the garment of ensuring my rights are not being overlooked. Pride parades around as a desire for recognition and affirmation. Pride can slow dance me right into isolation, believing that no one understands and no one cares about me. Pride is a nasty companion. It is so deceptive and damaging because it prohibits me from enjoying what I have, asking for what I need, and allowing God to transform my life.

I wonder at times why God seem so far removed from my cries. Could it be my friend Pride has driven Him into the distance? Psalm 138:6 states, "Though the Lord is on high, yet He regards the lowly; but the proud He knows from afar." It may take the rest of my earthly life to die to Pride, but each day I pray that with God's help one more deceptively dressed friend of Pride will be recognized and left to wither when I refuse to give it life. Perhaps in denying Pride I will become who it is God is calling me to be and He will become my ever present companion, replacing Pride. I do believe I just might enjoy the change of company.